[ Rafa laughs, and lets his eyes close again. This is
comfortable. ]
Because I like you.
[ And because the fae were after you, he thinks. Because
there’s probably a reason for that. Because you can’t be as normal as
you seem, and because the hint of magic hanging off you is proof that
you’re not. Because you might be a threat, if you ally with them, and
he needs to know your mind.
And because there’s at least fourteen freckles on each cheek,
and one on the carotid artery that wants him to bite it, and because
Rafa never could keep his curiosity in check. Even when he ought
to. ]
You are very angry. Afraid of me, I think, but angry with everything
else. And perhaps somewhat angry with me. To hold so much anger in is
bad for your heart, Adam. [ A little smile. ] It
already beats faster just at the sight of me.
[ He makes a small scoffing noise at the admittance. People don't like Adam, not naturally. Gansey is the reason he even has any friends in the first place. Before him Adam was probably more ghost than Noah, just drifting in silence, the bruises that littered him enough of a warning sign to stay away. ]
Stop flattering yourself. [ Because he knows what Rafa is saying, he knows because he's seen the way his smile goes flirtation and he's seen the vampire look at him through lowered lashes and he's not an idiot. ] And what do you know about it? Not everyone around here can lead a charmed life. Not everyone gets it easy. Maybe I am angry, but maybe it's the one thing that keeps me going forward.
[ He feels as though he keeps being pushed into giving too much of himself away. Adam seems to twitch a little at the end of his outburst, regretful. So he opens his soda to busy himself and takes a long drink, not looking at him. ] You don't know me. You don't get to say what's good for me.
[ Rafa lifts his shoulder. He can hear its speed, hear the
changing rate. He can smell the fear when it comes, and even if he
could not, he would see it in Adam’s body language along with his
anger. The human body tells a story simply by living. By existing.
Rafa is attuned to that.
And of course, he is also so much older than he seems. ]
You should not speak so rashly. [ He sits up a little
straighter, opening his eyes fully. His arms loop around his knees,
which oddly enough makes him look both younger, and far more serious
than he did before. ] Do you think I have led an easy
life? You assume much, for one who knows so little.
So do you. [ It's a quick retort delivered by the jut of a chin. If anyone were to look at them both now they'd see only teenage emotion. Not a vampire and a sacrifice. ] You can't come in here and assume things about me and then expect something different.
[ And Adam doesn't believe him anyway. A person who can give a car - like the one sitting outside - away on a whim doesn't know hardship. ]
Is this all just some prelude to you attacking me? Isn't that what you do? Because I'd rather that than a pissing contest.
[ Rafa scoffs, and rolls his eyes. Aside from the fact that he'd said no harm would come to Adam, there would also be a lack of elegance in that. Adam is more afraid of than enticed by him, and he prefers the taste of lust to fear any day of the week. ]
If that was my aim I would not waste time talking. I am not hunting you. I am hunting faeries.
But if you are asking whether I feed on humans, then yes. [ He shrugs. ] Of course I do.
Of course you do. [ He sounds mocking but there's a wariness to his gaze. ]
So you killed the fairy, right? That's what you stole my car for. That's why it was a smouldering wreck. You don't need to be here. You can just tell the Craigslist guy that I'll be the one to pick it up. You can go.
[ Because there is a vampire lounging on his bed and Adam still hasn't figured out why. ]
[ He almost wants to throw up his hands in the air, to do something that shows his level of confusion. For a moment it's stronger than his anger, the crease in his face turning to that insteady of fury. Adam Parrish isn't wantable. He's not desirable. ]
I'm not interesting. I'm not funny. I'm not anyone.
[ Rafa hisses as though in pain, and holds up his hand. ]
Adam, please. I can feel the chip on your shoulder from here. I did not come to help you pity yourself.
[ He scoots forward on the bed, crossing his legs beneath him and smiling. ]
You are amusing. You are angry. You have so much stress under your skin that your heart will most likely give out before you turn thirty. You have fourteen freckles on that cheek. [ Pointing. ] And sixteen on that one, and another on your neck, and it is cute, and you do not know it.
And you have magic in your blood, yet you think you are nothing at all. [ His head tilts along with his smile, and his fangs show themselves again. Just a little. ] Does it make more sense to you now?
[ He can feel the heat in his face before he's able to do anything about it. It floods to the surface of his skin in a horrible and inappropriate blush. ]
I told you, the magic isn't me. [ It's the easiest thing to deal with in the face of all the rest. While he should refute the stress claim he knows he can't. He's so serious, so driven. But he thinks if anything's going to kill him it won't be something as mundane as that. And being called cute. Well, that's never happened before. ]
I'm just ... the storage box. [ He shrugs a little. He won't tell Rafa about Cabeswater, but he doesn't want him getting the wrong idea that Adam can do anything. ]
[ Oh, now that’s a much better effect. Adam flushes, and Rafa’s
eyes light on his cheeks. He smiles, amused, and leans forward. Adam’s
scent is almost overpowering now – and yes, that description of his
magic makes sense, given the way he smells. It’s why magic is more
like a taint on him than something inborn. It’s what makes Rafa think
he could feed on the boy, which is pleasing. ]
The storage box. [ His voice is soft, though he rolls his
eyes. ] And I suppose you imagine that is accidental, and
nothing that you have for any reason at all. These things are rarely
without purpose. Do you think me as new to all of it as you are? No
wonder the fae are interested in you.
[ He will have to keep watch on this boy. His own interest
aside, he cannot allow them to get their hands on whatever it is that
Adam is storing. They don’t need more power on their side. Rafa needs
to ensure that his family are the ones holding all the cards.
]
[ It only proceeds to make his cheeks an even darker kind of red, the way Rafa looks at him with such interest. Inwardly Adam searches for just the smallest thread of dignity, his whole body the image of irritation and stress. ] It wasn't an accident.
[ He offered himself up, sacrificed himself because there was nothing else and he was the weakest link. His loss wouldn't have been felt quite so much. But instead it made him strong and angry and magic. ] Look, if these ... faeries turn up, I can defend myself. Fire, right? Deodorant and a lighter. Car oil. I can look out for myself.
[ Because he wouldn't let anyone take Cabeswater. ]
[ Rafa looks pleased about that first part. He'd known it couldn't have been an accident. Adam was foolish to even suggest that.
On the rest, though, he sighs. He drops his chin into the cupped palm of one hand, regarding the boy with an air of gentle judgement. ]
Yes, perhaps that might hold them off. For a time. It is unlikely to kill them, and may only make them angrier with you. I pinned that one with your car before I set it on fire.
But the sure way, if you want to know, is to remove the heart. No faerie can survive without that.
[ He doesn't move nor does he blink. It's not the first horrifying thing he's had to do. It's not the first being he's seen dead. He can do it and he will. He doesn't need anyone. ]
[ Rafa lifts an eyebrow at him. Adam is so defensive, it's amusing
in itself. Rafa's hand moves along the edge of the mattress, running it
over his fingertips. ]
It matters little anyway. I am here to herd them back where they belong. If
I am successful, you need never see them.
Contrary to popular belief, people just go around cutting out the hearts of things that threaten them. [ But Adam's resourceful. He's sure he'll manage. He helped Ronan with the nightmare creature, he can do this. ]
And you? You're going to go off in search of the rest, right? Leave Henrietta? [ Because he's not sure he enjoys the idea of a vampire roaming the streets. Not when there's the safety of his friends to consider. And definitely not where Cabeswater is concerned. ]
[ Rafa's face doesn't change at that first statement, but it does
resonate with him. People don't just go around killing things that threaten
them. That is all Rafa has ever done, all his life, even when he was human.
He was raised to do exactly that. The instinct has never gone away.
It is part of why he considers himself to have never been human, even
though he had once been mortal. He had never subscribed to human standards
of morality. He had been raised to something much different.
The question makes him look up, his eyes quick and sharp as they take Adam
in. ]
My Empire does not extend so far west. [ His head tilts to the side,
thoughtful. ] Not yet. When my work is finished here I plan
to return to my family. I do not know when that will be.
[ So much for getting rid of the other boy ... man, whatever he is. Adam's not even sure how old he is, all he knows is he looks like a teenager. A nice, safe, smiling teenager. ]
Right. [ He wonders if Rafa replacing his piece of shit car will be the last he sees of him. After everything he's mentioned about Adam and his magic, he highly doubts it. He's going to be a thorn in his side until he snaps and tries to murder him.
Actually, that might be enough to push him away. ] So, I'm guessing it's the same for you? Your heart, right? Cut that out. [ He leans back a little, looking at Rafa with a blank expression. ] Or am I going to have to ask them that.
[ Rafa gazes at Adam. His eyebrow ticks up, full of skepticism, because he doesn't believe that. It's not as though vampire mythology is not widely known in the human world. It does not all ring true, but the causes of death are alarmingly uniform.
Regardless, he shrugs, apparently unfazed by the implied threat. ]
It would not be enough. Removing the heart. Not for us.
[ He could have it on the table in front of him, and he still wouldn't die. He turns a smile up at Adam. ]
Faeries use their magic to harm us. It is like poison. I can smell it even in you. [ He nods, but there's a hunger to his eyes. ] But it is tiny. I think perhaps I could stand the taste, but of course. There is only one way to be sure.
You're my first. [ A pause and then awkwardly. ] Vampire. First vampire.
[ It would be really great if he could remain calm and collected. Really great. But no, if he's not raging away he's putting his foot in his mouth over and over again. ]
You're not drinking from me. [ No matter how much he'd like a replacement car. ]
[ Rafa’s smile is probably expected, but he can’t help it. This boy is amusing when he’s angry, but even more so when he’s flustered. Rafa likes that effect. ]
I have been many people’s first vampire. Everyone starts somewhere.
[ He’ll leave you to decide what he means by that. On the question of drinking, he again seems unfazed. A refusal doesn’t really matter to him. At present, he’s fairly confident in his ability to make others want him, even if they’re determined not to do so. ]
Don’t worry about your neck. If I planned to attack you, I would have already. You are easily agitated, you know. The car was unfortunate, and I am sorry, but I have replaced it. You know why I had no choice. Since then, I have not treated you badly, or harmed you in any way. Why then are you still so angry?
[ It makes the blush go a deeper red than before and Adam hates himself for it. ] Or, you know, they live great and long lives without vampires. Just saying. [ Adam's pretty sure he's the one who ran in to Rafa simply because it's his luck. He's always been hurtling headlong into danger - his father's fists, Cabeswater, what's a vampire to add to that. ]
Does it matter? [ He's angry. He can't help it. He's always angry. He has been since the moment he realised that emotions exist. It's a gift from his father. Anger issues. One he can't return no matter what. ] Look, I'm sorry. I just --. [ He's tired and his car's a wreck and he can't take something as beautiful as the one Rafa's offering. ] I'm not good with this. With ... talking. Plus, you're pretty much a criminal. [ Ronan was too. And yet Adam spent most of his time with him. It's a flimsy excuse. ]
No one lives longer than those favoured by vampires.
[ That’s not exactly a lie, but it’s not exactly true, either. Most vampires would be will to turn those they favour, but that requires turning, which means that the person favoured would no longer actually be human. Nor would they strictly be alive, although dying would be a much more difficult prospect.
Rafa shrugs, waving his hand. ]
A criminal by human laws, and as you point out, I am not one. My people have laws, and I follow them diligently. I always have.
[ Even in taking his father’s throne, Rafa had been convinced that he was acting rightfully. They had taught him that the strongest should survive. If his father had been stronger, he would have survived their battle. But for the sake of vengeance, too, he had been justified. His father had taken much from him. The throne had been small recompense for that. ]
It remains that I have not harmed you. If the old car is so beloved to you, I will have it rebuilt.
[ He shrugs, finding this an easy offering. Money means little to him, especially these days. ]
Not what I meant and you know it. [ He knows all about vampires and the lure of eternal life. Thousands of books and movies are made yearly about that kind of thing. Some people find it romantic. Adam can't imagine how stressful living forever would be. ]
Do you have a vampire court? [ It sounds a little snotty, a little like he doesn't believe in anything of the sort. ]
You said it couldn't be rebuilt. [ Adam's the mechanic, he told him that. But maybe fixing a car from scratch would have been way beyond his pay grade. ] I just need something to get me from a to b. I don't want people seeing me behind the wheel of that and wonder what I did to get it, I don't want them to look at that and feel like someone took pity on me.
Of course. [ Rafa spreads his hands in a shrug, and then frowns as he considers that question afresh. Court could have more than one meaning. Especially to a human who lived in a republic. His eyes narrow. ] Unless you mean a judicial court. We have no judges. We have Kings to fill that role.
[ That was all they needed. Rafa had never understood why the humans needed to make such a complicated system just to rule themselves. He found the vampires' way much easier. But then, he had never known anything else; even when mortal, this system had still been all he had known. ]
I said that it could not be fixed. Not that it could not be rebuilt. [ He stands up very quickly and comes close to Adam. He meets his eyes quite seriously, wiping any trace of humour from his face. ] I will leave the blue one. I will get the one from Craig. I will have the old one rebuilt. [ A slight pause, very brief. ] Whichever pleases you. Tell me.
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[ Rafa laughs, and lets his eyes close again. This is comfortable. ]
Because I like you.
[ And because the fae were after you, he thinks. Because there’s probably a reason for that. Because you can’t be as normal as you seem, and because the hint of magic hanging off you is proof that you’re not. Because you might be a threat, if you ally with them, and he needs to know your mind.
And because there’s at least fourteen freckles on each cheek, and one on the carotid artery that wants him to bite it, and because Rafa never could keep his curiosity in check. Even when he ought to. ]
You are very angry. Afraid of me, I think, but angry with everything else. And perhaps somewhat angry with me. To hold so much anger in is bad for your heart, Adam. [ A little smile. ] It already beats faster just at the sight of me.
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Stop flattering yourself. [ Because he knows what Rafa is saying, he knows because he's seen the way his smile goes flirtation and he's seen the vampire look at him through lowered lashes and he's not an idiot. ] And what do you know about it? Not everyone around here can lead a charmed life. Not everyone gets it easy. Maybe I am angry, but maybe it's the one thing that keeps me going forward.
[ He feels as though he keeps being pushed into giving too much of himself away. Adam seems to twitch a little at the end of his outburst, regretful. So he opens his soda to busy himself and takes a long drink, not looking at him. ] You don't know me. You don't get to say what's good for me.
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The heart does not lie.
[ Rafa lifts his shoulder. He can hear its speed, hear the changing rate. He can smell the fear when it comes, and even if he could not, he would see it in Adam’s body language along with his anger. The human body tells a story simply by living. By existing. Rafa is attuned to that.
And of course, he is also so much older than he seems. ]
You should not speak so rashly. [ He sits up a little straighter, opening his eyes fully. His arms loop around his knees, which oddly enough makes him look both younger, and far more serious than he did before. ] Do you think I have led an easy life? You assume much, for one who knows so little.
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[ And Adam doesn't believe him anyway. A person who can give a car - like the one sitting outside - away on a whim doesn't know hardship. ]
Is this all just some prelude to you attacking me? Isn't that what you do? Because I'd rather that than a pissing contest.
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[ Rafa scoffs, and rolls his eyes. Aside from the fact that he'd said no harm would come to Adam, there would also be a lack of elegance in that. Adam is more afraid of than enticed by him, and he prefers the taste of lust to fear any day of the week. ]
If that was my aim I would not waste time talking. I am not hunting you. I am hunting faeries.
But if you are asking whether I feed on humans, then yes. [ He shrugs. ] Of course I do.
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So you killed the fairy, right? That's what you stole my car for. That's why it was a smouldering wreck. You don't need to be here. You can just tell the Craigslist guy that I'll be the one to pick it up. You can go.
[ Because there is a vampire lounging on his bed and Adam still hasn't figured out why. ]
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[ Rafa smiles, sweetly, and then deliberately lounges back on the bed. His hands fold against his stomach and he stretches out his legs. ]
Yet if I did that, I would not know you better. I could not - how did you put it? Insert myself into your life?
[ His smile widens. ]
I told you, Adam. I like you. I have no desire to walk away.
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[ He almost wants to throw up his hands in the air, to do something that shows his level of confusion. For a moment it's stronger than his anger, the crease in his face turning to that insteady of fury. Adam Parrish isn't wantable. He's not desirable. ]
I'm not interesting. I'm not funny. I'm not anyone.
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Adam, please. I can feel the chip on your shoulder from here. I did not come to help you pity yourself.
[ He scoots forward on the bed, crossing his legs beneath him and smiling. ]
You are amusing. You are angry. You have so much stress under your skin that your heart will most likely give out before you turn thirty. You have fourteen freckles on that cheek. [ Pointing. ] And sixteen on that one, and another on your neck, and it is cute, and you do not know it.
And you have magic in your blood, yet you think you are nothing at all. [ His head tilts along with his smile, and his fangs show themselves again. Just a little. ] Does it make more sense to you now?
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I told you, the magic isn't me. [ It's the easiest thing to deal with in the face of all the rest. While he should refute the stress claim he knows he can't. He's so serious, so driven. But he thinks if anything's going to kill him it won't be something as mundane as that. And being called cute. Well, that's never happened before. ]
I'm just ... the storage box. [ He shrugs a little. He won't tell Rafa about Cabeswater, but he doesn't want him getting the wrong idea that Adam can do anything. ]
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[ Oh, now that’s a much better effect. Adam flushes, and Rafa’s eyes light on his cheeks. He smiles, amused, and leans forward. Adam’s scent is almost overpowering now – and yes, that description of his magic makes sense, given the way he smells. It’s why magic is more like a taint on him than something inborn. It’s what makes Rafa think he could feed on the boy, which is pleasing. ]
The storage box. [ His voice is soft, though he rolls his eyes. ] And I suppose you imagine that is accidental, and nothing that you have for any reason at all. These things are rarely without purpose. Do you think me as new to all of it as you are? No wonder the fae are interested in you.
[ He will have to keep watch on this boy. His own interest aside, he cannot allow them to get their hands on whatever it is that Adam is storing. They don’t need more power on their side. Rafa needs to ensure that his family are the ones holding all the cards. ]
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[ He offered himself up, sacrificed himself because there was nothing else and he was the weakest link. His loss wouldn't have been felt quite so much. But instead it made him strong and angry and magic. ] Look, if these ... faeries turn up, I can defend myself. Fire, right? Deodorant and a lighter. Car oil. I can look out for myself.
[ Because he wouldn't let anyone take Cabeswater. ]
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[ Rafa looks pleased about that first part. He'd known it couldn't have been an accident. Adam was foolish to even suggest that.
On the rest, though, he sighs. He drops his chin into the cupped palm of one hand, regarding the boy with an air of gentle judgement. ]
Yes, perhaps that might hold them off. For a time. It is unlikely to kill them, and may only make them angrier with you. I pinned that one with your car before I set it on fire.
But the sure way, if you want to know, is to remove the heart. No faerie can survive without that.
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[ He doesn't move nor does he blink. It's not the first horrifying thing he's had to do. It's not the first being he's seen dead. He can do it and he will. He doesn't need anyone. ]
Cut out the heart, got it, class dismissed.
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You are not pleased to know?
[ Rafa lifts an eyebrow at him. Adam is so defensive, it's amusing in itself. Rafa's hand moves along the edge of the mattress, running it over his fingertips. ]
It matters little anyway. I am here to herd them back where they belong. If I am successful, you need never see them.
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And you? You're going to go off in search of the rest, right? Leave Henrietta? [ Because he's not sure he enjoys the idea of a vampire roaming the streets. Not when there's the safety of his friends to consider. And definitely not where Cabeswater is concerned. ]
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[ Rafa's face doesn't change at that first statement, but it does resonate with him. People don't just go around killing things that threaten them. That is all Rafa has ever done, all his life, even when he was human. He was raised to do exactly that. The instinct has never gone away.
It is part of why he considers himself to have never been human, even though he had once been mortal. He had never subscribed to human standards of morality. He had been raised to something much different.
The question makes him look up, his eyes quick and sharp as they take Adam in. ]
My Empire does not extend so far west. [ His head tilts to the side, thoughtful. ] Not yet. When my work is finished here I plan to return to my family. I do not know when that will be.
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Right. [ He wonders if Rafa replacing his piece of shit car will be the last he sees of him. After everything he's mentioned about Adam and his magic, he highly doubts it. He's going to be a thorn in his side until he snaps and tries to murder him.
Actually, that might be enough to push him away. ] So, I'm guessing it's the same for you? Your heart, right? Cut that out. [ He leans back a little, looking at Rafa with a blank expression. ] Or am I going to have to ask them that.
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[ Rafa gazes at Adam. His eyebrow ticks up, full of skepticism, because he doesn't believe that. It's not as though vampire mythology is not widely known in the human world. It does not all ring true, but the causes of death are alarmingly uniform.
Regardless, he shrugs, apparently unfazed by the implied threat. ]
It would not be enough. Removing the heart. Not for us.
[ He could have it on the table in front of him, and he still wouldn't die. He turns a smile up at Adam. ]
Faeries use their magic to harm us. It is like poison. I can smell it even in you. [ He nods, but there's a hunger to his eyes. ] But it is tiny. I think perhaps I could stand the taste, but of course. There is only one way to be sure.
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[ It would be really great if he could remain calm and collected. Really great. But no, if he's not raging away he's putting his foot in his mouth over and over again. ]
You're not drinking from me. [ No matter how much he'd like a replacement car. ]
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I have been many people’s first vampire. Everyone starts somewhere.
[ He’ll leave you to decide what he means by that. On the question of drinking, he again seems unfazed. A refusal doesn’t really matter to him. At present, he’s fairly confident in his ability to make others want him, even if they’re determined not to do so. ]
Don’t worry about your neck. If I planned to attack you, I would have already. You are easily agitated, you know. The car was unfortunate, and I am sorry, but I have replaced it. You know why I had no choice. Since then, I have not treated you badly, or harmed you in any way. Why then are you still so angry?
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Does it matter? [ He's angry. He can't help it. He's always angry. He has been since the moment he realised that emotions exist. It's a gift from his father. Anger issues. One he can't return no matter what. ] Look, I'm sorry. I just --. [ He's tired and his car's a wreck and he can't take something as beautiful as the one Rafa's offering. ] I'm not good with this. With ... talking. Plus, you're pretty much a criminal. [ Ronan was too. And yet Adam spent most of his time with him. It's a flimsy excuse. ]
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[ That’s not exactly a lie, but it’s not exactly true, either. Most vampires would be will to turn those they favour, but that requires turning, which means that the person favoured would no longer actually be human. Nor would they strictly be alive, although dying would be a much more difficult prospect.
Rafa shrugs, waving his hand. ]
A criminal by human laws, and as you point out, I am not one. My people have laws, and I follow them diligently. I always have.
[ Even in taking his father’s throne, Rafa had been convinced that he was acting rightfully. They had taught him that the strongest should survive. If his father had been stronger, he would have survived their battle. But for the sake of vengeance, too, he had been justified. His father had taken much from him. The throne had been small recompense for that. ]
It remains that I have not harmed you. If the old car is so beloved to you, I will have it rebuilt.
[ He shrugs, finding this an easy offering. Money means little to him, especially these days. ]
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Do you have a vampire court? [ It sounds a little snotty, a little like he doesn't believe in anything of the sort. ]
You said it couldn't be rebuilt. [ Adam's the mechanic, he told him that. But maybe fixing a car from scratch would have been way beyond his pay grade. ] I just need something to get me from a to b. I don't want people seeing me behind the wheel of that and wonder what I did to get it, I don't want them to look at that and feel like someone took pity on me.
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[ That was all they needed. Rafa had never understood why the humans needed to make such a complicated system just to rule themselves. He found the vampires' way much easier. But then, he had never known anything else; even when mortal, this system had still been all he had known. ]
I said that it could not be fixed. Not that it could not be rebuilt. [ He stands up very quickly and comes close to Adam. He meets his eyes quite seriously, wiping any trace of humour from his face. ] I will leave the blue one. I will get the one from Craig. I will have the old one rebuilt. [ A slight pause, very brief. ] Whichever pleases you. Tell me.
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